Reflections

I seldom take the time to reflect without overthinking, overanalyzing, and rambling on and on into insigificance. I thought maybe today, in the midst of yet another "busy" week, it might be most advantageous to just take a minute and refelct . . . about whatever comes to mind.

Life continues to baffle me. Not my life, I just mean life in general. That I am here; that I am breathing. Life. What is it? It is hard for me to understand the unbeliever here. How do they come to an understanding of this life? Of their life? I admire those with a faith . . . really any faith. If they can have at least that. I think the plague of our culture is that so many have none. Instead of a deeply held core faith, many in the American culture spend life as hedonists seeking whatever pleasure comes their way. Sex abounds. Materialism is everywhere. Greed. Lust. Envy. On and on the list goes. We are an "if it makes me feel good" people. Life equals the pursuit of happiness. Yes . . . but hedonistic happiness? So many settle for that and it is so sad really.

To know the beauty of a faithful marriage. To know the depth, the passion, the reality of one woman who has known one man, and one man who has known one woman. I thank God every day for that truth he has allowed me to share in. There is perhaps no more foreign concept to those my age who are not Christians in this culture. The beauty, depth, and reality that they lose out on is truly depressing. When I've had conversations with people about it, at first they don't believe me, and then they don't understand why anyone would do that. Tied down, they call it. It doesn't satisfy hedonism, but there is a deeper longing than hedonism. That deeper longing is filled.

Now enter Clark. The love that continues to grow and mature for that little guy. Now at a year and a half old he continues to show me much about God. He also shows me alot about people. He makes me sad for all the children born out of wedlock. Who grow up without dads or moms. Who grow up without strong families. I have seen these families in youth ministry. The family is the single most important factor in faith development, that has been my experience. It has also made a lasting impression on my understanding of grace. God will have grace on many who have had horrible family lives. I remember reading somewhere that there is no greater faith than one who clings to his or her faith in God after being abused by a minister of the church (particularly if that minister is a family member). I believe that. Family affects so much. God has given Mary Beth and I great families. Of that I am forever grateful to God. That, perhaps more than anything else, has made us who we are. We strive to make a strong family for our children as we both know.

God is all around. He consumes my thoughts all day long. He is the subject of a study I engage in that will never end. His mysteries are endless. Shame on us for trying to box him in to theology or reason. God is so much bigger than that. Perhaps that is why so many are losing faith in the church . . . it is the ultimate God-boxer-inner. We should let God be God, and we strive to know him the best we can. If our churches would rediscover theology proper and put it in the proper context with our christology, perhaps there we could find a better and more refined place for God. Maybe we could stop chasing him and realize he is right here, wherever we are . . . at a desk, in an office, in a den, in the car, he's everywhere . . . waiting . . . loving . . .